I’ve posted a lot of my photos on this blog. I’m comfortable with that because I’m comfortable sharing my journey with others. I’m what you’d call an open book. I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve at all times, and I don’t have a problem with creative vulnerability most of the time. Today I’m posting something a little bit different. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I’m going to do it anyway because I feel like sharing the journey!

Here’s my first abstract painting:

abstract painting

Prototype – acrylic on canvas

I’ve always struggled with the idea of control in creative endeavours. Too little control and I feel like I’m not contributing enough to the process; too much control and it tends to stifle all expression and enjoyment.

When I was a teenager, I played around a little with automatic drawing. I liked the idea of losing some control in an effort to free up expression and creativity. I’ve tried to do something similar here.

The piece above is my first completed acrylic abstract painting. I like some of it, and not other parts. It was an exercise in finding a balance of control/non-control. I used a variety of objects to scrape, smudge and stamp the paint onto the canvas. I layered crude beginner’s brush strokes in an effort to lose myself in the creative process enough to feel liberated, but not so diminished in the painting process so as to feel like a third party.

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